I am having A Moment

[geminigirl]

I'm having a pre-wedding moment. I feel like I should be more stressed about stuff, but I'm not. Still, I picked up my veil and headpiece today and while they're both beautiful, I hate them. I hate putting them on, just like I hate my dress. Or more precisely I hate wearing my dress. None of it feels like me.

This would all make a great deal more sense if I were, say, having issues or second thoughts about getting married, but well, I'm not. I'm all for getting married, and with the move coming and whatnot, in fact, with the move coming so quickly, I almost suggested that we go and get someone to do the legal bit last weekend.

It's not about that particular dress...I just don't think any wedding dress would be any better. I want to feel like myself on the wedding day.

Maybe this is my pre-wedding jitters?

Comments

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

Okay, so you're having meta-feelings? :-)

[geminigirl]

I'm gonna cry.

But yes. Metafeelings.

And if you make me cry, you'll be meta-sorry?

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

I'll try not to make you cry. It's rarely if ever a goal of mine.

[geminigirl]

I'm not kidding about the "about to cry" party. I'm seriously having a meltdown. If I were to lose it, it wouldn't be your fault at all. Not even a little.

I'm just off balance, and out of sorts over the whole thing, and perhaps it's that I just don't want that much attention. Or something...I can think of a lot of things.

[quasigeostrophy.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[geminigirl]

Thanks. I need lots of that.

[datagoddess.livejournal.com]

He gives very good hugs.

I don't think it's strange to be in the mode of "just get on with it!" that I'm hearing from you. Sounds like the wedding is running on it's own steam now, and you're feeling out of control of it. And you want your life with Cayne to just start, already, which will be official with the wedding.

I was the same way, and so was Dan. By the time our wedding day rolled around, we were both so ready for it to be OVER already, so we could just go on with it, already. It's OK to feel overwhelmed, tired of it, etc. It's has nothing to do with not wanting to be married, but with wanting the wedding to be done with.

*hugs*

[vvalkyri.livejournal.com]

:hugs:
There's so much built around the wedding industry it's probably hard to get away from it?

[geminigirl]

I probably have to freak out about something...

Any idea if you'll be there?

[sweet-tea79.livejournal.com]

One of my friends is having a similar problem; the can't wait to be married, but the actual wedding isn't doing it for her. Her mom has pretty much taken over the wedding planning, which means that everything is much bigger and flouncier than my friend would want. Her take on it, though, is that if given the choice she'd rather have the so-so wedding with a fantastic marriage. I think she's going to get it.

The wedding itself may not be exactly what you want it to be; but it's just one day. The marriage is your life and is far more important than a dress, or a veil, or a headpiece. You have what's important, which is better than any dress.

[geminigirl]

Agreed. The wedding will happen and whatever happens will happen, whether it rains or not, or whatever.

Still, I'm having stress and anxiety over this, and I know it'll be okay.

It wouldn't be a wedding if there wasn't something to make me crazy.

[aliki.livejournal.com]

I dont know if I can say your feelings are normal, but I certainly felt a little like that before the wedding and it confused my mother so immensely, she cried.

I generally had a "ehh, i could care less" about the dress, the veil, the shoes, etc. I just wanted to get it over with. Don't get me wrong-- I was looking forward to being married, but considering we lived together and I felt, in my heart, like we were already married and committed as such, the actual wedding was just a formality to the world that we were now, officially, together.

[wait.livejournal.com]

I HATED my wedding band. Even though we had it custom made.

I think part of it is being in wedding mode 24/7. Life Before Wedding seems like it almost never existed.

[melaniesuzanne.livejournal.com]

I hated my shoes. But I was afraid to get new shoes because my mom had purchased my shoes, had them dyed and then got special lace stuff for the toes. I called my mom, in tears, and begged her to let me get new shoes. She, of course, thought I was completely nutty because I was so upset and had no problem whatsoever with my changing shoes.

In other words, you're normal. :) And soon all the stress will be over.