It will be ok. Getting through the first several weeks can be tough. There's a huge learning curve, for everyone.
It was so hard. I was exhausted. I was petrified. My baby didn't sleep unless I held her, and even then only for short periods. I couldn't sleep when I was holding her. She nursed constantly, and I was blistered and bloody and would have given anything for her to take a pacifier for the love of god please take a pacifier and ... *sigh* I'm trying to say no matter what you're feeling, no matter what you're going through, you're not alone. Many of us have been in similar situations, and we're pulling for you. If you want to scream or rant or cry or fret or thrill or laugh or whatever, it's ok. You'll make it through, and find that satisfaction on the other side that you've done your damnedest for your child, and that it really is all just fine.
It's terrible at first, and even when it physically gets better, the emotional shock of the huge change takes a long time to process. People don't acknowledge that. It's just terrible at first. Do you know Jodi (lj user="leatherfish">? She is another mama who gets it. It helps to talk about it to people who understand and won't judge you or act like you are ungrateful to be overwhelmed and kind of miserable sometimes with a new baby.
Not that I am a parent, but I remember one of my coworkers and his wife being so tired and overwhelmed they called their child "the little bastard" for about 9 months.
I'm positive that you're doing fine. I'm also positive that you're being incredibly overwhelmed. But, you know, that's to be expected in virtually any new job situation. And you've just signed up for the most complicated job on earth.
You're strong and will get through it, and just think you have the greatest gift in the world and that gift has only begun to teach you the true meaning of patience and understanding.
Just remember ... breathe.... you will get through this
You are better than "good enough," especially if this is about what I think it's about.
BTW, sorry we got disconnected yesterday. I lost my Internet connection and only just got it back! I'll be logging into IM shortly if you want/need to talk. You can always email, too.
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:30 am (UTC)The first few weeks just really, really suck.
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:47 am (UTC)It was so hard. I was exhausted. I was petrified. My baby didn't sleep unless I held her, and even then only for short periods. I couldn't sleep when I was holding her. She nursed constantly, and I was blistered and bloody and would have given anything for her to take a pacifier for the love of god please take a pacifier and ... *sigh* I'm trying to say no matter what you're feeling, no matter what you're going through, you're not alone. Many of us have been in similar situations, and we're pulling for you. If you want to scream or rant or cry or fret or thrill or laugh or whatever, it's ok. You'll make it through, and find that satisfaction on the other side that you've done your damnedest for your child, and that it really is all just fine.
Such an adventure.
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 02:56 am (UTC)Welcome to motherhood.
Hang in there.
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 03:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 12:02 pm (UTC)Hang in there. *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 06:17 am (UTC)So. Buck up. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 01:02 pm (UTC)breathe...
Remind yourself.
You're strong and will get through it, and just think you have the greatest gift in the world and that gift has only begun to teach you the true meaning of patience and understanding.
Just remember ... breathe.... you will get through this
no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 01:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-08 01:32 pm (UTC)BTW, sorry we got disconnected yesterday. I lost my Internet connection and only just got it back! I'll be logging into IM shortly if you want/need to talk. You can always email, too.
XOs!