And the best thing you've ever done for me...is to help me take my life less seriously

[geminigirl]

A year ago I was heartbroken at yet another Mother's Day passing and still not having success getting pregnant. I wrote about pricing Clomid, worried about side effects and was gathering my strength to start going through whatever hoops the insurance company and reproductive endocrinologist might make me jump through in order to get pregnant.

Twenty three days ago I gave birth to Naomi, a child I doubted I'd ever have.

The process of getting pregnant certainly caused some strain between the two of us. I'm sure parenthood will do the same sometimes. Certainly our initiation hasn't been easy...battling the hospital pediatrician who was practically accusing me of being on drugs-you don't really want to hear things like "I've seen babies on drugs who were less jittery than yours" and this whole mess that has been breastfeeding...but you know what? I'm sure there will be more hard parts later on, and these tests now are just preparing me for later. Maggie likes to remind me that there's a lesson in all this somewhere, even if I don't know what it is yet. Perhaps the kindness of strangers? Asking for help? Less stubborness? Letting go? To stop asking permission to make decisions? Who knows...I certainly don't, but there are all sorts of things I can learn.

This is the first time I celebrate mother's day for me. Not the first time I celebrate motherhood. And there's a long road ahead.

Comments

[jpallan.livejournal.com]

Happy Mother's Day, love.

[bizetsy.livejournal.com]

Happy Mother's Day.

[slinkr.livejournal.com]

Happy Mother's Day!

[geminigirl]

Thanks and fingers crossed.

[fj.livejournal.com]

Yes, because when I look at you I always think "oh yeah, she looks like a meth head".

Sometimes docs are just dumb

[geminigirl]

This one was a piece of work. I loved the way that one of the first questions our pediatrician asked us when we saw him on Monday was "Was she really young?"

There was the accusation of drug use. There was the part where she told me I was bullying her into letting us out of the hospital. Naomi had a bit more jitter/startle going than most newborns. This doctor didn't seem to get that it was normal newborn reaction to being on the outside...first she thought it was drugs, then it was Naomi's blood sugar being too low and we were killing her brain cells by letting it fall "so low" (so low that there's controversy about whether she was within a healthy range or not depending on which study you read and oh yeah, our pediatrician practically laughed when we told him that part,) then it was something metabolic or with her parathyroid gland.

And I was a bully for insisting that she release us from the hospital when test after test after test revealed nothing and when I insisted on more communication from the pediatrician than I was getting. I agreed to do all the things that she was insisting that we do in the hospital including monitor Naomi's blood sugar with heel sticks at home the way they did in the hospital, and to follow up with our own pediatrician on Monday (we made the appointment Friday afternoon, about fourteen hours after Naomi was born.) She finally said that we could go home if the baby had a wet diaper, a blood sugar at 45 or better and if we agreed to see our pediatrician on Monday.

I'm looking forward to seeing the itemized bill from the hospital and seeing if they drug tested the baby...I'll be very upset if they did.

[danger-chick.livejournal.com]

This person is not one of your drs? Just a hospital dr?

Would you feel comfortable reporting this person to the state medical board?

[geminigirl]

Thing is, she didn't do anything wrong per se...just was generally a jerk about things. I don't think she's quite used to parents who don't lie down and accept everything she says without questions, or push back against things she's saying.

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

Happy mother's day, girl. Enjoy!

[meepkitty.livejournal.com]

Happy Happy Mother's Day to you! :)

[jaclyn.livejournal.com]

Happy, Happy, Happy mother's day. :-)

[therealocelot.livejournal.com]

I really wouldn't be surprised if the newborn period, especially with a new baby, really is the hardest there is for many people, between major life change and sleep deprivation and physical recovery and all that.

[yix.livejournal.com]

Sometimes dealing with an overt jerk is better than a subtle one. But man oh man did yours sound overt. :)

I think trying to get pregnant was harder than being a parent in terms of couple strain. But then again, I'm only 2.5 years in...but both attempts were harder on us than the middle part of just being parents. So maybe that's comforting? or something. :)

[3-black-cats.livejournal.com]

Happy belated mother's day! :)

[aliki.livejournal.com]

Happy Mother's Day.

I *AM* tired of talking about how expensive Clomid is, and the side effects, and I'm tired of all these needles. I fervently hope next year I'll be in your position (not the dr problems, but a mother).

[geminigirl]

I hope you will be too.

BTW, if you're willing to shop at Wal-Mart, 50 mg of Clomiphene Citrate (generic Clomid) is available on their discount plan. I got mine at Costco, and it was about $20 for 5 tablets.

[pecunium.livejournal.com]

I've been lax in Lj for the past few months. Congratulations, and many happy returns.

TK