Cute Little Boxes

[geminigirl]

I'm thinking about how some of my life lands in cute little boxes.

I'm writing out the invitations for Imagine. (yes, they're on the way...finally.) And they're sorted neatly into pile...the work people who get invites with my name only on them, the work people who get invites with both my name and aquariumgirl's name on them...the friend who's husband will freak out if the invitation has both our names on it (she won't, he will) so I have to carefully put only my name on it, and the people who get invites with both my name and hers on it.

In some ways, I'll admit, it doesn't bother me to sort things that way; some details of my personal life should be separated from some things. Some work contacts-namely site liasions don't really need to know who I'm dating, for example. And at the same time, some of it does bother me-it shouldn't matter to most people in my life whether the invitations come from both of us, or just me. I shelter some people, but maybe I should stop. Or maybe I shouldn't.

Oh, and when addressing an envelope to a same sex couple, in what order do you put the names?

Comments

[valacious.livejournal.com]

Are you sheltering them or yourself?

What order would you put names of a heterosexual couple who each has a different last name?

[geminigirl]

To the first-it depends on the situation...it's not, for example worth the fight that ensues between Rach and her husband every time my dating women comes up.


To the second-I was taught that the man's name goes first if it's a heterosexual couple with different names. (I toss this out in situations where I'm sleeping with one of them and usually put the name of the person I'm sleeping with first, but that's not a normal situation...)

[rdhdsnippet.livejournal.com]

Re the same sex couple mailings... in the past, I have addressed it to the person I knew best in the couple, and their partner. So, 'Mr. Bestfriend and Mr. Bestfriend's Boyfriend. I felt like it looked awkward no matter what I did, but that was what I decided.

I wonder if Ms. Manners has tackled this one yet...

Re the boxes... true, your coworkers don't care who you're dating. But it would make more sense to do it all one way or the other. I could see an argument for "me and my SO to friends, just me to coworkers", but it's hard to see a logical argument for further breaking it down, honestly.

That being said, I'm not 'out' at work, so who am I to give advice

[geminigirl]

It would make sense to do it all one way or another, except that some of the invitations are going to her friends...so they kinda should have her name on them.

I ended up doing a pile with both names and a pile with mine only. It was annoying more than anything...I sort of wish my life didn't get split up that way sometimes.

My co-workers don't seem to care-it's site contacts outside of my office. My co-workers? I'm more out about a lot of things than I expected or wanted to be...(was outed a few times by accident, but c'est la vie)


And it's good to have your advice; I'm luckier than most in how out I can be, and I need to remember that.

[agent139.livejournal.com]

reverse alphabetical, ALWAYS

[slinkr.livejournal.com]

When addressing an envelope to a same sex couple, you put the name of the cuter one first. If you don't know or they're equally cute, alphabetical order works fine.

As for how to put your name on the invitations, I think I see it as being less about telling people who you're dating than about telling people who's hosting the event. If aquariumgirl is hosting the party with you, I'd say put her name on all the invites. That you're hosting a party together isn't necessarily a statement about your personal life. If this is really your party, I would just use your name and ask her to send a note to her friends encouraging them to attend.

[geminigirl]

It's not quite as simple. If I were the lone host, it would be easy...but it's the sort of thing where a bunch of co-workers and I got together and are hosting the event together...but I'm not putting all of their names on the invitation (not enough room, don't feel like all that writing and a bunch of other stuff.) It wasn't complicated to write the invitations separately, just annoying.

And I usually put the one I'm sleeping with first. :)