36 weeks. No one would stop us now

[geminigirl]

We've hit the point at which really, no one would stop labor if it were true labor. This is an overwhelming thought considering the state of readiness. You know that silly ready.gov website, or whatever it is...we're sort of the antithesis of it. The house is a mess, there's almost nothing ready for the baby, and seriously...I'm not mentally or emotionally ready to become "mom" yet.

I said to pinkfish last week when we had dinner that I was sad to be giving up some of the parts of my previous life, even if it's for a short while. That I missed it and that I don't think I'd given myself permission or space to grieve for that. I'm looking forward to change but also overwhelmed by how massive the change is. It seems to me like a bigger change than getting married or moving to Florida, but one that I certainly chose willingly and wanted. Although perhaps without the whole big picture.

We finished our childbirth classes. Cayne says he feels completely ready for his part of labor and delivery and that makes me feel good. I'm seeing my OB once a week now. Last week I had the group B strep swab (and no rectal swab, either, which seems to be routine for some people.)

I've had some serious ab pain as muscles there have stretched...really tender abs. Beyond anything I've done before in terms of overworking muscles. The baby makes some movements though, where you can see my belly move as the baby shifts. Even more so is the entertainment of "poke the foot"-it's not difficult to find where the feet are wedged into my abdomen-they're easy to feel, and one can poke at the foot and get a response. It's actually pleasant...I enjoy it and I think I'll miss the kicking when things are done.

We'll see what happens next. It's just a big new roller coaster ride.

Comments

[bicrim.livejournal.com]

I would really, really, recommend the book "Mother Shock" to you for pre-birth reading. This IS a huge change, and your instincts are right on the money about what a hard transition it can be. I'm here if you want to talk about it.

[3-black-cats.livejournal.com]

I'm really looking forward to hearing how things unfold for you as you come down the home stretch. I had given some thought to sending you some music for labor and birthing, but decided that while the things I had might be perfect for ME to labor/birth to, I wasn't sure if it would be your style, and maybe it would even be totally WRONG, so I didn't put anything together. I will, however, be sending all kinds of good thoughts and peaceful birthing wishes your way. :)

[geminigirl]

Because I have no idea what will be right for me to labor or birth to, I asked for input from others. I've never done this before so I don't know what works...you know? I think it's very much the kind of thing that I may not know until it's time, or even if music is right at all. Therefore, if you feel like sending me music, whether or not it turns out to be right for me in that moment, I appreciate it.

And thank you for the good wishes.

[3-black-cats.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I hear you. I can totally see myself putting together a "birthing" mix of music, and then finding that it's totally wrong when it comes to giving birth.

But I'd be happy to send you something, even if it's not for giving birth, and I think I have an envelope around here that has your address on it. Maybe I'll surprise both of us and send you something. Please don't hold your breath, or hold it against me if I don't, though. But I've been thinking about you when I've been driving around in my car listening to various songs, and thinking about you having a baby. :)

[geminigirl]

Yeah, you know...I've bee thinking a lot about having a baby too...;)

[veryfineredwine.livejournal.com]

hee!

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

I remember all of those feelings. Hell, I had them before having Ashe, too...and you'd think by the second one, I'd have not had pre-mom panic.

If you want someone to talk to, I'm a good listener.

As far as music goes, I had mine all picked out...and ended up sending Derk to Kmart to buy a copy of "Dark Side of the Moon" when I was in labor with Liam. So ya never know. ;)

Mom-shock

[rockstarbob.livejournal.com]

It's good to think about that sort of thing now, I feel. I didn't start the grieving process until after Aesop was born and every time I tried to think/talk about it, I just felt selfish. I knew things would be different, but I really had no idea how dramatically and instantly they would become so.

All that was just to say that I relate and am here if you want/need to talk.

[cmariewt.livejournal.com]

You and another lady on my f list are due around the same time. I think she is 35 weeks? Anyhow, you have both been on my mind a lot lately. I hope everything goes as smoothly as possible for you. I am sending massive good luck vibes your way.

[geminigirl]

Thank you for thinking of me. I'm 36 weeks now-I'm "due" April 7...which really means anytime between now and whatever the first date my OB has available to induce me after 4/21. So sometimes in the next six or so weeks I'll have a baby.

[lala2.livejournal.com]

It sounds SO cool though...you're growing a whole PERSON inside of you!!!

[mactavish.livejournal.com]

I hope it goes as smoothly as possible when it's time.